It's finally a wrap! Such mixed feelings. Always. Especially for this project.
Filming《大大的梦想》is by far the hardest production of my life. Not because of the script or filming process, but because i started filming when Layla was just 4.5m old. In this 3months of filming, I went thru 3 rounds of growth spurt, transitting her to sleeping alone, teething, her learning how to sit and crawl, and starting solids. Well, that basically equates to NO SLEEP for Mama! On top of that, there's still scripts to memorize every night. I could have slept in and let my helper do the nightshifts. But i felt terrible that she'll have to do both the day and night! Also, that means Layla will not have me to take care of her at all! So, i chose to wake up when she wakes up at night.
The beginning was the hardest. Both Layla and i had to get use to a new rhythm and routine. She was crying so much bcos i wasn't there for her to latch. She was totally not familiar with drinking from bottles then. So in the day she didnt drink much, neither did she sleep much. It was a horrible time for me at work. I was zombie from lack of sleep, and worrying abt how people was handling her at home. My heart and my body was nv in the same place.
On days I'm not working, i will bring her out and prepare purees so when I'm not able to feed her, other people will have frozen cubes ready for her. In short, i never rested. 😭
Oh, dont get me started on pumping. I lugged a huge bag with pumping equipments everywhere i went. and pray that my cooler bag dont melt under the hot sun! I pumped in the car whenever we move from one location to another. Which means i had to drive everywhere instead of taking company transport(again, no rest). Sometimes, in desperation, i even had to resort to pumping in the toilet. Yikes, hate that the most! So unhygienic!
Fast forward 3 months later, what i need to deal with now is my dwindling milk supply, bcos i just couldn't pump as often when i was at work. I def dont have enough to meet her demand now. 😭 And even if i do, she doesnt wanna latch anymore after realizing the convenience of drinking from a bottle. So looks like it's gonna be (cont below)
